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Tuesday, November 24, 2009

The 16 nevers of communication

This is something I came across recently, although I had read it before.  I liked it so I posted it up on my refrigerator.  It's a good marriage booster.  Good communication is such an important thing if you want a healthy marriage.  But it is hard too!  So it's good to be reminded of what things we shouldn't say.

The 16 "Nevers" of Communication with Your Spouse:
1.    Never speak rashly
2.    Never confront your spouse publicly
3.    Never confront your spouse in  your children's presence
4.    Never use your children in the conflict
5.    Never say "never" or "always"
6.    Never resort to name calling
7.    Never get historical
8.    Never stomp out of the room or leave
9.    Never raise your voice in anger
10.  Never bring family members into the discussion unless they are a direct part of the problem being addressed
11.  Never win through reasoning or logic and never out-argue
12.  Never be condescending
13.  Never demean
14.  Never accuse your spouse with "you" statements
15.  Never allow an argurment to begin if both of you are overly tired, if one of you is under the influence of chemicals, or if one of you is physically ill
16.  Never touch your spouse in a harmful manner

4 comments:

JessicaElizabeth said...

I love that. Thanks for sharing!

Randall and Rachel Beita said...

This is great! How much our lives would improve with more joy and love if we did not do these things.

Alison @ Hospitality Haven said...

I like #2! It's so important to speak to your spouse privately. Airing your "dirty laundry" just makes the matter worse!

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